Two models of relationships: Having a God Centered Relationship

While looking around I came to understand that every relationship we build is centered around something. We live in an era where Hollywood has painted a perfect picture of marriage and relationships and many today dwell on this illusion.

I do know this.. The man I marry will believe in God more than he believes in anything else, including me. he’ll love God more and he’ll believe in His ability to heal, transform, restore and perform miracles. I know that and I know he’ll recognize that as I chase after God, I’m chasing after him.

I have been thinking about the two relationships I’ve had in the past.  See I’ve been doing this thing so terribly wrong.  First, although I dated Christian men, I think I’ve allowed the exercising of that faith to be a far too individual act.  We may have occasionally gone to church together but that’s not enough. In building a solid relationship God needs to be at the very center.  In the future I’d like to pray with the person I’m with and make an effort to keep God thoroughly ingrained in the very fabric of the relationship.

Often we try hard to win or impress people with who we are that we at times forget our purpose here on earth and that’s to wholly and fully serve God.  Well in the future in a relationship I will love God with all my heart and all my mind and I will not LEAN ON MY OWN UNDERSTANDING but always acknowledge him.

Now let’s take a look at the two model of relationship as seen today

Hollywood’s model of relationship:

1) Find a “suitable” person;

2) fall in love with the person;

3) build all your dreams, hopes and aspirations around the person;

4) If it fails, then repeat items 1-3.

To me this is a selfish model of relationship, which offers us the modern world. When selecting a partner we have this idea that we are to look for a rich, beautiful, intelligent and obedient person who will always do and be everywhere we please. Then we try to somehow fall in love with this person and ascribe to them all our dreams… This sooner or later leads to disappointment because our motive was not sincere. Ultimately these relationships break up because we always want to be on the receiving side, but the truth is Love ought to be Mutual.

God’s model of the relationship:

1) Become a “suitable” Person;

2) To live in love;

3) Trust in God and try to “please” him in our relationship.

4) If relationships break down – repeat items 1-3.

God’s model is somewhat contrary to what the world offers us. According to it, we must first become this most “suitable” person, in the deepest sense of the word it means to follow Christ and be transformed by him.  If you want a good wife in future, you must do your best to be a good husband and it needs to start now, in other for it to work in all possible ways. We need to take care of our spiritual, moral and physical growth. Yes, some of us have put a lot of effort into that and we need to remember that we are laying the foundation for our future happiness.

The next step in God’s relationship models is to live in love. And we should understand that love – is not only that pleasant feelings that we feel towards another person. Speaking kind words, gentle embrace, walking holding hands together – doesn’t always mean love! Love – is giving a person what they need the most, when they least expect it. Just like Jesus coming down to lay his life so we might be saved.

The third step in God’s relationship model is trusting in the Lord and building our relationship around his word and commandments. Remember that God’s commandments are not to restrict but rather to correct us.

Be sure to build a God Centered Relationship! 

Psalm 37:4


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